FUCK.

Arrgh...

Chinups - 12
Standing Broad Jump - 240
Situps - 40
Shuttle Run : 10.06 seconds

TOTAL : 20 points, all "A"

... I had to sprain my leg during the uphill climb of the 2.4 km route to FAIL my 2.4 km run.

like wtf?

no. in fact everybody was like going. WTF?

KNNBCCB.

Now I have to wait an additional 3 months before my promotion.

WTF?

CB lah. This is like a fucking sway week for me.

Repealing the Hatchet.

Lots of people have asked me about my opinion on homosexuality, me being a christian extremist, and me being gay as well.
Do I think it's right? - No.
Do I think it's wrong? - No.

I just think that it's a phenomenon in human beings that human beings are inherently imperfect. That out of every few hundreds being born everyday, one turns out different.
Do we isolate albinos?
Do we isolate children born with cerebal palsy?

Not that I'm comparing the gay community with defects, but rather, morality and religion dictates what makes us "perfect" or "imperfect".

If God says that homosexuality is a sin, then it is a sin. But so is smoking, gambling, pre-marital sex, stealing and even masturbation a sin.
Society criminalize what it wants to criminalize then releases "sin" into the general populace.

Is it fair? Why does section 377A exist, when people can openly gamble in Singapore?

If the government is indeed doing this for the Christian (majority) populace, then why not ban all the others as well?

While to some it may seem that it's a difference of issue, to those that are affected, it's outright hypocrisy.

I struggle with 3 things in my Christian walk, to the point of crippling.

1) Reconciling the fact that "God" is a "Loving" God, and yet condemns what I can't help doing.

2) That Homosexuality stand out as a "greater sin" in the Christian community then any other issue put altogether. (Even the bid to stop the building of the integrated resort didn't go through).

3) That the entire world is poise on the brink of being antichristian because of the fact that Encompassing Love and Condemnation are contradictory, and Christianity and Condemnation seem to be walking hand-in-hand with each other.

The worst part? - The three points above are undisputedly happening within Christian community in Singapore.

I'm gay.

Christians look at me with skepticism and cynicism, because I claim to love God, and yet I do things that are contradictory to His Word.

Non-Christians look at me with bewilderment because they wonder why I still cling on so tightly to a God that "hates" me and a community that loathes me even more.

Funny thing is, I'm yet to face direct condemnation from my christian peers and leaders, yet I can tell that they approach that topic with extra caution when talking about it in front of me.





Gone are the times when gays had to hide in the shadow, away from the sun, away from the mobbing populace.
We can't change ourselves, and it's ridiculous to even think that we can.
Trying will only cause us to end up hurting the opposite sex and ourselves.

Why love when unrequited love is like a million daggers that pierces the soul?




Singapore has already been classified as a closed, conservative country, the babylon of the gay community, and the capital of intolerance in South East Asia.

Do I care? No.

I love Singapore the way it is now. And for all what people say, I'm still gay. And I'm still a Christian.

Don't you think that repealing it takes away the stinging kind of ironic fun you have?



It only makes me more self-assured that I am indeed unique, and all of you are different.
It's understandable that you all can't understand.
But I don't care.

Just be the same. =)

Random stuffs of boredom

okie. the song on my blog currently may sound quite old, but it was one of my most favorite songs when I was alot younger...

ok. like 5 years younger.

The lyrics is just really meaningful... But you have to watch the show first before you'd understand..
It's about a guy who is colored blind, and the only way he could add color to his world was through dancing, till a girl came along in his life...

but both of them were just not meant to be together...

=/

ok.. emo-ing...

bah. I was in the gym this morning doing cross-training, when I accidentally stepped on a body-fat analyzer.
OMG. STAGMONT CAMP HAS A BODY FAT ANALYZER!
*cough*

ok.. I didn't accidentally step on the body-fat analyzer, I deliberately did it...

and it measured... 16.8%.

wtf. There is NO decrease in body fat since 731,176,527,901 years ago!!
I've been in this percentage since god-knows-when!!

and I've only gotten heavier!!
i'm currently a solid 63 kg.

can't seem to get rid of those stubborn layers of fat... ARRGH.

The Diet Myth

In the classic starvation study (the Minnesota Semi-Starvation study) men were dieted for 6 solid months reaching 4-5% body fat at the end of the study. Then they were refed and body composition was tracked. By the theory being advocated, they should have gained lots of LBM and little fat during refeeding, they were clearly super lean to start out with. But this is absolutely not what happened.

As would be expected based on the metabolic adaptations to dieting, their bodies were mainly primed to replenish fat stores. Reductions in metabolic rate, fat oxidation and thermogenesis all contributed to a preferential gain of body fat and these systems didn’t reset themselves until all of the body fat lost had been regained (8). Quite in fact, signals from body fat (i.e. leptin and the rest) are the mechanism behind this physiology (9).

8) Dulloo AG et. al. Autoregulation of body composition during weight recovery in human: the Minnesota Experiment revisited. nt J Obes Relat Metab Disord. 1996 May;20(5):393-405.

9) Dulloo AG, Jacquet J. Adaptive reduction in basal metabolic rate in response to food deprivation in humans: a role for feedback signals from fat stores. Am J Clin Nutr. 1998 Sep;68(3):599-606.





note: Andrew DOES NOT advocate dieting, but rather, healthy eating. If you eat air for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you're doing to expect airy results.

Quote of the Day - Life is too short to tolerate bad food.

Paradigm Shift

Last Sunday, I was brooding to my friend that I have a long, long break before my NTU course will start...
Since the courses start in August, and I ORD in September,I have a almost 11 months of nothingness before my degree program starts...

So I was like considering some major options that I can foresee myself doing during the almost-year-long-break :

1) Rejoin STOMP to be a Temp Video Producer -
That is a pretty good option, if not for the fact that I still feel so guilty for leaving the company when they needed me really badly. Even though it was for an important reason, I wonder if I'd still have the guts to ask if they have a vacancy for me..

2) Work at a Dermatologist as an apprentice or helper -
Wow. Now that is a positive step towards my final goal ain't it? Problem is, it's not going to help my financial woes during the long, dry period. It's really interesting, but I highly doubt my parents will fund my piggy bank.

3) Teach Piano to kids
I think this is the most flexible, potentially profitable and least time consuming job among the three... only one small problem.. WHO WANTS TO LEARN PIANO? I'd really suck at teaching classical piano because I hate it so much myself... but it's still important as it provides the fundamental grounding...
I can teach them stuff like "November's Chopin" or "The Secret" or even "Canon in D", but they'd be struggling in deep water because they havn't learn how to even save themselves...




... so while I was demanting myself with these considerations, somebody quipped, "Why don't you become a personal fitness trainer?"

I think it just killed 2 birds with one stone...
no. more then that. it killed like the entire flock.

It would solve my goal of being in the paragon of fitness, allow me to learn resistance, isolation, anaerobic and aerobic programs professionally, and more importantly, achieve my consistent ultimate goal of wanting to make people look good.

and again, no. I don't believe that making people look good is to make yourself look bad.
(in response to Seamus' demoralizing comment. lolz)

Hmm...
To top it off, I'm a quite a health nut as well.

Haha... I think if I ever achieved it, lots of my old acquaintances will probably keel in a dead faint.

Well, there are a few routes that I can choose, all require funding, but I think I can pay for at least 75%... hopefully my parents can quip the rest..

Preperation
* Mandatary : Cardio Pulmanary Certification SSC
* Mandatary : SSC Fitness Instructor Course

From there -

The Professional Route
i. NIE's Physical and Sport's Science course
iia. Diploma in Sport's Nutrition
iib. Diploma in Physiology
from there
iii. American Fitness Trainer Certification
iv. SSC Creditation
v. SBBF : Singapore BodyBuilding Federation Accreditation
vi. Holistic I : Sports Massage and Post-Trauma recovery (Diploma)
vii. Holistic II : Tui-Na and Chinese Physiotherapy (Diploma)
viii. Holistic III : Holistic Treatments for Sports Injuries

Final Stage : Degree in Sports Medicine


or

The Easy Route
i. SSC creditation
ii. Diploma in Sports Nutrition
iiia Portfolio 1 : Weight Management and Diet
iiib Portfolio 2 : Competitive Bodybuilding
iv. Application for SBBF Accreditation (if possible)
v. AMFTB part-time certification

Final Stage : I have no idea.


Sounds difficult huh... but the thing is these course and programs can overlap each other simultaneously..
so if I'm hardworking enough, I should be able to get a decent set before I reach 30 years old.


interesting huh?


haha...

I wonder if I would even be able to achieve it...
It sounds pretty interesting to me... but I've gotta study deeper into it...

=)

I feel my goals shifting.



*evil laugh*